Wednesday, March 11, 2009

My Motivation and My Strength

I would never have believed it if you told me a month ago that I would run over three miles without stopping. Don't worry this is not all about weight loss. This is more than a "how to" blog on running 3 miles. This is my heart and soul.

I technically began writing this blog in my head while I was running (and consequently soaking my sore muscles in a bath!). My prayer in writing this is that, no matter where you are in your life today, at least one of you will be encouraged. And if you're not encouraged today, maybe something I say today will come back to you in the days to come when you need it most.

My journey to this point in my life really began about a year ago when I envisioned myself running a 5K. So late last winter I decided to lose weight and get in shape. I joined the YMCA and signed up for water aerobics, since I LOVE the water and that’s how my Mom got into shape several years ago. I lost about 15-20 pounds and was feeling good.

When school was out for the summer, there way no way I could lug all four of my kids to the Y every day, and I ended up gaining five pounds back over the course of the summer. It's easy for those pounds to find you when you're not running from them! J Fall came, and I was so excited to have the kids back in school so I could begin water aerobics again!

After just a week of getting back to the YMCA, the pressures of our lawn business weighed (no pun intended) heavily on me, in addition to the winter depression I experience every year brought on by our long Michigan winters. By Christmas I had gained all the weight back and was again uncomfortable in my clothes. I remember looking at a picture Keegan took of Todd and me the night we decorated our tree and thought, "Ugh, that can not be me. What's it going to take for that not to be me?"

But January 1st came. New Year Resolutions! I thought, “Sure, I'll make losing weight and getting into shape a resolution!” I worked out with a video for a few weeks, but didn't put too much pressure on myself. Really, the biggest change I made was in my eating habits.

In February, my baby turned five! The week before his birthday, I came to the realization -- as I'm sure other mothers do -- "My excuse for retaining my baby weight is FAR from gone. I have no more excuses." My dream of running a 5K wasn’t going to happen with the food choices I was making. We eat rather healthy I think, but I'm a big snacker and HAVE to have my chocolate! But as I began to slowly back off, I found that those crazy people were right . . . the less junk food I ate, the less I craved it!

The day after my son turned five, I started running. Now, I AM NOT a runner. Let me clarify -- I AM NOT a runner. I played basketball and soccer all four years of high school. And while I loved the sports, I HATED the running and had to put up with my exercise-induced asthma. But now I wanted to prove something to myself! I had invested in a pair of running shoes that I’d found on clearance for $18, so there were truly no more excuses.

My first goal was to run maybe four times around the block. I had no clue how far that was (it turned out to be a mile), but it was a start. I also decided I was going to do some research and learn about any 5Ks that were going to be held in late spring so that I could work towards a goal.

I also began supplementing the running with fitness videos (the ones I invested in several years ago and have used off and on - YOU know what I mean : )). A friend shared with me that keeping the interest is key, and she is so right! I didn't want to get bored and use it as an excuse to quit. So If I didn't run, I still did something else that I could look forward to doing that would burn the calories.

The first week I ran, my daughter, Savannah (who will be nine this week), heard me mention to Todd that I wanted to do a 5K in the spring. Naturally she wanted to do it with me -- which leads me to my other motivation . . . my kids, particularly my daughter.

I've always stressed to my kids how important it is to be healthy. And if you know Savannah , you know she’s an athlete. She LOVES soccer, discovered a love for basketball this winter, and has shown a love for running. The running she started doing last winter, which she said was in preparation for spring soccer! She just loves to try anything and will do what it takes to do it well.

When Savannah ended up being the only child in her elementary class to pass the first trial for the Presidential Physical Fitness Test, I thought, "Wow. Someone has to keep up with her, so it might as well be me." I knew then that I didn't necessarily want HER to be the example to ME, but that I wanted to be HER example. I realized that no matter how proud I am of my own Mom for her weight loss and healthy lifestyle, that I didn't want to wait until I was 50 to do it. I wanted to do it NOW, while I still have several more years with Savannah at home! Since it was obviously something she loved to do, I wanted it to be something we could do together -- something positive that she could carry with her her entire life.

I began running a mile, and the next week I pushed it to 2.2 miles. In addition, I changed the route to make it harder to just turn into my driveway and call it quits. It wasn’t easy to push myself that hard, but my motivation was strengthening, as I was not only feeling better, but Savannah was so proud when I'd tell her how much I'd run WITHOUT stopping (that was her first question when I did the first mile). It's such a blessing to be able to amaze your child!

Yesterday was the first day we actually got to run together outside. She's been running laps at the school gym and has already done three miles!! Of course she ran ahead of me and admitted that she had slowed down to not get too far ahead of me. Oh well . . . that just means she’ll be quite surprised when I start keeping up with her!! J

As we were nearing home, finishing 2.2 miles, I called ahead, "Do you want to go one time around the block and make it 2.5 miles?" To my (hidden) disappointment she looked back at me and said nonchalantly, "Sure!" We walked an extra block to slow down our heart rates, and I told her that my goal was to run three miles by Friday. She suggested that I do it tomorrow, but I said didn't want to be too hard on myself and would work towards it instead. It was a good time with her.

Today was dreary. It was drizzling. But I thought, “I can’t let that be my excuse. I HAVE to run three miles by Friday so I can keep on track for the 5K on March 28.” So I set off with the goal of another 2.5 miles. At my usual spot, about a minute from the house, I strangely wasn't feeling the desire to walk. I was instead pleasantly surprised at my energy level!

I continued running and even quickened my pace. But suddenly I felt God say, “Don't rush. You're in this for the long haul.” So I slowed my pace but continued running. I began talking to the Lord and going through some things with Him, including some things to write in this blog. When I found myself on my block again, I could NOT believe how light I felt. I knew God was there lifting me up, making my load a little lighter and my breathing a little easier.

I was at 2.5 miles and decided that I was going to keep going and try to reach 3.2 miles. I was still running! I could NOT believe I was going to make the three mile mark! Wouldn't Savannah be proud!! GOD is SO GOOD. I made the 3.2 and started walking to slow my breathing.

When I reached our house, I walked to get the trash cans and bring them out to the road. In that time, I felt the Lord was telling me to run some more. I said to Him, "What do you mean? I just ran over three miles! That was good." But honestly, I felt like I could do another mile!! So I obeyed and ran another half a mile. I ran a total of 3.7 miles today! Afterwards I told Him, "Okay Lord, You proved Your point. You and I both know it's time for a bath and laundry." : )

What point am I trying to make here? I'm glad you asked. The area you’re struggling with right may not be exercise or eating habits. It may be your job, your marriage, a strained relationship, money, your mortgage, a morality issue, an anger or bitterness problem, an addiction, or your health. These are all REAL problems that need REAL solutions -- and those solutions can ONLY come from a REAL GOD.

By now you may have stopped reading and clicked on another link, but my prayer is that you haven’t. As unrealistic as it may seem, having a relationship with the one and only Jesus Christ gives you the strength AND purpose to deal and/or get through whatever struggles might be coming your way.

I've been a born-again believer since I was a child. I don’t have religion. I have a RELATIONSHIP with God and His Son. But just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean I've been through valleys myself. Some lower than others, and some longer than others. But being a Christian means that I have help when I DO go through the valleys. I don’t go through them alone! I can say that when I have relied on the Lord, it has makes the difficult things easy. The Bible says, “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” That means if your burden is heavy then you're not allowing God to do His job and carry the weight.

Sometimes it’s hard to let go of your own agenda and let the Holy Spirit of God do His work. Do I ALWAYS do that? Do I always “Let God?" And how DO we just “Let God?” There’s a story told of a young man who was struggling with every day difficulties, just like many of us do. He went to church one night and heard a message about just “Let God.”

This puzzled the young man. How DO you just “Let God?!” At the door that night were handed out packets of adhesive letters containing six letters -- L-E-T-G-O-D -- that those attending could post up in a place in their homes as a reminder to let God have their problems.

He arrived home and prepared for bed. He took the letters out of the package and pasted them on the edge of his bookshelf where he could see them from his bed. He stood looking at the phrase, still not sure if he really understood what it meant or how to apply it. He went to his bed and before crawling in, went to his knees in prayer asking God to show him how he was to let God have full control.

He finished his prayer, and climbed into bed. Before reaching over to turn off the light, he took one last look at the letters on his desk. Startled, he sat up straight in his bed. There has been a change. During his prayer, the letter D had fallen to the floor. Not longer did it read “Let God.” It now read “Let Go.” You see, the secret of being able to “Let God” is to learn to “Let Go” of our lives and let Him have His way.

Do I always “Let Go?” Of course not! I'm a child of God, but I’m human. Satan uses whatever he can to thwart God's plans for me -- including making sure that I try to make things work out in my own strength. I'm sure he has all sorts of plans to divert this weight loss plan, like the tapioca in my microwave as this moment shhhh : ) ( well, now it's just not any fun that I've admitted it to all of Facebook. It'll have to wait until tomorrow so I can enjoy it but it can be burned off more easily.)

You see, Satan wants me to fail. He wants me to live a defeated Christian life. But hard decisions become easier when you KNOW that His will is being done. You don't need faith for tomorrow, although He may give it. Having FAITH for THIS moment is what He asks. God only gives us enough light to take the very next step. He doesn't ask you to understand all the fallout. God’s will is a daily process that works towards a fixed goal. But to meet that fixed goal, He simply asks you to take what He is giving you or asking of you TODAY and just . . . obey.

Relinquishing control gives you the freedom to be who He designed you to be. Let me tell you, sowing obedience is the BEST way to reap blessings!! Whatever God asks of you, He will ALWAYS accompany it with His provision to equip and sustain you. Where God guides, God provides.

For me, AT THIS MOMENT, God's been working wonders because I've made decisions to fully rely on Him. My decision to repent of my sin and ask Him to be my PERSONAL SAVIOUR was made as a child. While it’s just the first step, it’s the MOST important step. Having Him guide me through the years is the most REWARDING step. No matter how many pounds I've gained, no matter what hurtful things I've said or things I’ve done, no matter what prideful choices I've made, no matter what others have done to me, and no matter WHAT happens on this earth, I have a Heavenly Father who is ALWAYS looking out for my BEST and loving me through my WORST.

The Word of God says, “For I am persuaded [convinced] that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, or things present, nor things to come, not height nor depth nor any other creature shall be able to separate me from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus my Lord.” What a promise! No one else could love me like that. God is working overtime on my behalf to take care of me, just like my earthly father would.

If you're still with me, let me say that I didn’t set out to write this. I was actually going to just write about my excitement about running those three miles, but actually I believe the Lord used that second wind to draw me to Him and have some time with me. God usually gives me something in poem form when He lays something on my heart, but I guess poems aren't for everyone -- so maybe one of you needed this encouragement in a LOOONNNGG blog form instead!

God promises in His word that nothing He does will return void (empty). And because I have a personal relationship with Him, I also know that there’s apparently one of you who needs something I’m sharing today. And . . . some of you are probably thinking, "Stacey's just weirder than I thought." If you do (LOL) I actually don't mind! It takes being different to make a difference. The men and women who have changed the world are the men and women whom the world has not changed.

I would LOVE the opportunity to talk to you and share my faith in Christ with you. I trust that if you don’t have a relationship with Jesus that He'll use me to tell you about Him. Our inclination is to be worried about what others might think of us if we take the time to think about our relationship with God. But the truth is that when it’s all said and done, we will each -- individually -- stand before God. And what will you say? There is no softer pillow than knowing all your sins have been forgiven -- your past, present, and future sins -- and that you KNOW (not hope) where you’ll be when this life is over. I would LOVE for you to experience your life as it was meant to be. God has a plan for your life!

And if you DO have a personal relationship with Him, I trust you have been encouraged to face your hurdle head-on and jump it with ease, knowing that God is the one lifting you over. Don’t live your life “under the circumstances!”

So my point is that “It is GOD which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure." Philippians 2:13. And that "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Philippians 4:13. You see, while God wants my best, He proves to me that HE will accomplish His will through me, even when I know I don't have strength or the ability. You see, it’s not about me. It’s about HIM.

The world wants to tell us that the way to power -- personal success -- is all about OUR strength, our money, our beauty, our talent, our ability, our education. But GOD’S way to power is through our weakness. II Corinthians 12:9-10 says, “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.”

The way to tap into the power of God is to let go of our own strength and become weak. In doing so, we exchange our power for His. That’s a pretty good deal when you realize that you end up with the power of the One who created the universe! I believe that God has, does, and WILL work on my behalf. Truly, if He sent His ONLY Son to earth for the SOLE purpose of DYING for us, then He also CONTINUES His work FOR us and THROUGH us.

I’m still growing in my faith in Christ. I have not reached the finish line in my Christian life nor in my efforts at weight loss, but I’m running a race toward a goal in both areas. At this time in my life, I have faith that I WILL lose the weight and get in shape. I’ve struggled to do it on my own, and am thanking Jesus for the circumstances that have come together to motivate me to do something about it.

But what circumstances has God brought into YOUR life to make you realize how powerless you really are to change your life on your own? The only way to “Let God” is to “Let Go” and let Him have full control.


Stacey Wallace
and awesome editor Sheryl Williams

These are all songs with varying degrees of beat but I trust one will be a blessing to you as they all have spoken to me in one form or another in recent months:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFXB_GwRHYA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vh65wLVbaww&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJODOpe_M8E&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSTYHTplyFg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJEPg7fKOtc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtenFJ6x75k

You're in my prayers.

1 comment:

Amy said...

Hey - this is Julie Reidsma's sister, Amy! Thanks so much for sharing this blog entry with me! I enjoyed reading your story and thought it was well-written. I also was very inspired to remember that I CAN do something with God's strength. I just started running, too, and can run 2 miles. Not consecutively though! My first goal is a 5K in May and my second is a 10K in July! I am not a runner either but am going to become one! My knee always held me back...I have pain in my kneecap. Anyway, just wanted to say thanks for the great story!